Architecture or...

...Photography?

That is the big question in my life right now.  I began my college set on what I was going to do.  Play golf and study Interior Architecture and Design.  I believe now, however, that my heart is changing...

In high school, I took two years of photography and could have taken a third.  I felt that the class was taking me away from what I loved.  I loved taking pictures for fun, as a hobby.  I loved the classes, yet they were beginning to take the fun out and putting stress in.  So for my senior year, I did not take photography.  Then came college.  What was I going to major in?  It wasn't necessary to choose one.  Many people don't choose right away.  I was going to be one of those people with the major of 'Undeclared' until one day when I was looking through the list of majors.  There it was... Architecture.  Something jumped out at me and I began to research it.  Everything seemed just right, everything seemed to fit me and what I wanted to do!  So after a long period of time of deliberating, I declared my major in Interior Architecture and Design.  I was thrilled!  The first semester came and went.  I enjoyed the majority of the semester with 4 different design classes.  As second semester was getting close, I went out with a couple of friends.  We got on the topic of school and what we wanted to do with our lives.  A very good friend of mine asked me a simple question...  Is architecture what you plan on doing after college?  For some reason it threw me off guard.  Many people have asked me similar questions and I had never really stopped to think about it.  Was this what I wanted to do with my life?  I know I want to play golf, but what about life without golf... is architecture what I wanted to do?  As I began to debate with myself over this issue, I also began once again researching other majors just to see what else there was.  Something caught my eye.  Something I had missed or ignored the first time around...

Photography.  

For some reason, I got excited!  I began researching it and found that it was really interesting.  The more I thought about it, the more I couldn't understand why I didn't acknowledge it when I decided to major in Architecture.  As time went on, I realized how much I do truly love  photography.  I began to think about my decision back in high school to not take photography.  I believe it was possibly one of the best decisions I have made.  There is a saying that absence makes the heart grow fonder.  Well, even when it comes to taking a class that saying is true.  As I read course descriptions for the Photography major, everything seemed to fit.

I love my architecture classes.  I love my professors.  Yet, something is missing.

I have no passion for it...

I was at a party with friends, family, and my camera.  I saw a "Kodak moment" and started snapping shots.  After a while, someone came and asked me if I was a professional photographer.  I was surprised by the questions and simply said, "No, it's just what I love to do."  A few minutes later, another person came to me and asked if I was a photographer for a living.  I laughed and yet again said no and that it was just what I love doing.  I was shocked that two separate people at two different times came and asked me the same question.

Photography makes me happy.  It is something I love and enjoy doing.  So after a long and hard time of debate and prayer amongst myself and God, I have made my decision...

I love Architecture and I always will, but photography is my...

Passion.

In the midst of a storm...

...God is there.

I was out playing golf today with my wonderful team.  The day however, not as great.  The sky was full of low hanging clouds and this fast moving air some people like to call wind.  As we began, so did the rain.  There was a light rain here and there for most of the day.  Except when I was on the tee of number ten.  I tee up the ball, and begin my pre-shot routine.  As I look down the fairway, I see the sheet of white rain coming directly towards me.  And I said, "BRING THE RAIN!" Then I laughed and hit one of the best drives I had all day.  Just as the rain began to lighten up a few holes later, I turn around and see one of the most amazing rainbows I have ever seen!  It was Incredible! It started as just a small piece and grew to a complete arch.  And the colors were insane! They were incredibly vibrant! And then there were TWO!  Two full rainbows! (This is the point where I once again wanted to be holding a camera instead of a golf club at that moment!) In the midst of being pelted by cold raindrops, God places something so amazing in the sky!  Even when everything seemed so awful God said in His own way, "Everything is fine. I am here."  Just as in life when we struggle with hardships and feel like everything is going against us, God is always there.  We may not be able to see the end of the road, but God put little things like Rainbows in the sky to encourage us and to let us know He is still in control!

(This is a picture of a rainbow I saw when I was at the New Mexico state fair after a tournament.)

On my way home, the truck in front of me had a Tennessee license plate with a Chicago Cubs plate cover on it! And I pumped my fist in agreement!  Then I noticed that truck had a sticker on it that said this...

"Relax...God is in Control."

It is so true!  God is in complete control! It is so encouraging to know that God is always there...Even in the midst of a storm!

I have fallen in Love with...

...Edward.

A few weeks ago, I would have denied any and all interest in him.  Yet, something changed.  I found out for myself what many girls have been fully obsessed with.  Edward Cullen is a fictional character from the Twilight book series by Stephanie Meyer.  It was recently made into a movie as well.  I do not like reading, so reading four books that are all over 400 pages wasn't going to happen.  But I am never opposed to seeing a movie with good popcorn and a Dr. Pepper.  So I gave in, went against what I thought was my better judgement, and went to see the movie...

I was blown away.  I was not expecting to experience what was held in Twilight.  It is about a normal girl who meets a vampire, Edward.  Yes, a vampire.  I, along with so many others, am in love with a vampire...from a fictional story!  Although I have not read the books and have only seen the first movie (it covers the first of four books), I have enough to justify my reasoning for being completely obsessed with Edward.

Ever since I was a little girl, all my friends and I wanted was for our own 'Prince Charming' to come and sweep us off our feet.  It seems now that the tides have changed.  All I hear now is "I'm waiting for My Edward."  How can one character seemingly change the way most girls think.  The question should not be Who is Edward, but instead, What is 'Edward?'

I may not know everything about Edward.  I have not read the books, so I know there is a lot that I am missing.  However, from just a simply movie, I was able to come up with this...

GOD is Edward.

Edward loves unconditionally.  He is always there for Bella (the main character in the series).  He would do anything for her.  Although not an exact match in ANY way, there are many things that point to why so many girls have fallen in love with this character.  At one point in this movie, Edward must protect Bella do what is best for her.  She gets upset because it is not what she wants.  Many times in life, God is leading us in one direction to take care of us.  We often kick and scream because we do not see where God wants us to go or why He wants us to go.  God knows what is best for all of our lives. We have to trust God and follow Him, just as Bella must do with Edward.  During another part, Edward asks Bella if she is afraid of him.  She replies that she is not.  Within the next few moments, Edward shows her what he truly is.  Bella finally says that she is afraid.  As with God, I know there should be a balance between Grace and Fear.  I know that I need to fear more of God, and he has actually shown me that recently.  God has full control over everything.  Yet, we still have the choice to follow him.  We can be afraid, yet so intrigued and so in love that we do not stray away.

There are many things that point to this connection of God and Edward.  I know that it is no where near a direct match.  But I do think that a major part of why so many are 'in love' with the character is that so many things Edward does resembles the way God loves us.  It is what every girl wants.  We want someone to come sweep us off our feet.  We have moved on from wanting a prince to wanting our 'Edward' to come. A Prince is 'Perfect.' He rides on a horse and rescues the Princess.  That is a fairytale.  I believe what draws so many into Edward is that he is the modernized prince.  Yes, he may be a vampire.  Yet, it is more realistic than every girl in the world sitting in a castle far away waiting to be rescued.  I do not believe there are enough castles, horses, or dragons to be slayed!  We as girls and women want to be loved unconditionally by someone.  Thankfully, no one ever has to worry about being loved.  God is our Ultimate Edward.  He loves us with a love that is so great it is hard to comprehend.

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." ~1 Corinthians 13:4-8

This is the kind of love that I long for and strive to be.  I am thankful to have God as my Edward.  And I am truly bless to have a second Edward, my earthly Edward...

...I am done waiting for my Prince to come...

...My Edward Showed Up First...

My Life...

...is what I like to call Beautiful Chaos...

With family, friends, school and a never ending list of activities, my life seems to be constantly going.  Although extremely chaotic and stressful at times, I try to enjoy every moment that passes...I had never really taken the time to appreciate everything in my life until recently.  A great friend of mine stopped me and told me to look at all that I have in this life.  I have an amazing and strong family that I am truly blessed to have.  My friends are incredible and are always there for me. I have been blessed with a passion for golf, and am now playing for a Division One college.  I also have a love for art on multiple levels.  Photography and music are two things I have could probably not live without.  I enjoy taking hundreds of photos in one setting, and many people can and will agree that 'hundreds' is an understatement! I constantly have music playing whether through speakers or in my head.  There are many other things that I love, but two...No, THREE...of the most important things that I love are these...

• Chick-Fil-A
  
• Dr. Pepper
• And most importantly, My personal Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ!

Without God in my life, I would be completely lost.  I have truly seen miracle happen, both small and large, but all significant.  "Oh Lord...Be our strength every morning, our salvation in time of distress..." ~Isaiah 33:2.  This verse has become somewhat like an anthem for my life.  Trusting in God is difficult, yet incredibly rewarding.

He has shown me that even though life may get hard at times, it is all for his purpose. Jeremiah 29:11 says, "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'"  I know this life is not easy.  Yet, with God next to me every step of the way, I have nothing to fear.

In Beautiful Chaos, I plan to share my faith, stories, interests, and photography to document it all!  Please Enjoy!

In Him,

~Bethany